On Writing

"Writing is an exploration. You start from nothing and learn as you go."

E.L. Doctorow

The above quotation sums up the way that my focus on writing has expanded from just the end finished product to thinking about the process itself. Writing as a process can help you to learn what it is you think about a topic and what you know. Again it is that plunge into the unknown that makes writing frustrating and exhilarating. Freewriting into rough paragraphs can then provide the fodder for later ideas and other ways of looking at a text; it can expose the gaps in your research and help to find new ways of structuring a piece.

More than anything I've found by thinking about the process the end result seems to happen in a less stressful manner, and so my body takes on less physical stress. As at the end of the day the ability to think with clarity and write are bodily processes. For example tiredness after a bout of insomnia can leave you feeling drained, tetchy and sluggish. It can feel difficult to focus. These are not ideal conditions to start writing part of a complex theoretical work but this is not to say that on those days where you are not well rested you shouldn't try to write. A little and often goes a long way. Think tortoise and not hare.

Exploring Submission

Submission (Entre Ses Mains) by Marthe Blau

I began reading this novel with excitement, optimism and intrigue, the way that I approach all of the novels that are potentially of interest to my PhD material. I start by reading the book straight through in one sitting. I try to focus on the plot and the way that it represents female masochism. In the back of my mind there is always the glimmer of hope that one day I will find a book where the protagonist is a strong woman, who chooses to submit and can sustain this kind of relationship whilst maintaining her own independence. A woman should have her friends, work, family and the D/s relationship but I am yet to find a novel that portrays such a woman. [If anyone knows of one, do let me know!]

Initially I found the prose to be incredibly strong and enjoyed the way that I became absorbed in its atmosphere. I felt as though I was inhabiting the woman's mindset because the sex scenes were so vivid that one could easily imagine what was happening. This also helps the reader to understand her perspective in the relationship. This excitement continued in terms of my PhD when I found a reference to Vanessa Duries's novel Le Lien (The Ties that Bind) as at the time I'd planned on including writing on this book for my PhD. My positive feelings for the book ends here.

My main frustration with the novel focuses around the depiction of the protagonist herself, who risks her bourgeois life (husband, child, good job as a lawyer) for the sake of the adventurous lover who gives her orders. In response she becomes dependent, stops eating, risks her job and can't concentrate on anything other than him. A case of 'need' and obsessive fixation on someone else. It shows this kind of relationship to be destructive to any sense of a woman having her own life and responsibilities. Perhaps it is because I am seeking to find a positive depiction of heterosexual female submission that fuels my dislike for this book but I do wonder what it the point of writing yet another book that shows a woman being troubled by her sexual desires and thus unable to function in society anymore. Does the existence of all these books suggest that it isn't possible to represent the kind of relationship where one submits but still maintains their own identity? Have any novels been written that fall into this remit?

Self-Reflexivity

Lately I've been thinking a lot about simple ways to improve my happiness. This was inspired by Gretchen Rubin's 'The Happiness Project' blog and book. I have become much more self-conscious about the way I go about the world and whether I am reaching my own idea of potential. I think this project has come to me at a time when I am ready for it, which fits the saying that when you are ready to learn the teacher will reveal itself to you. Why am I telling you all this? The chapter of the book that I finished over lunch was about allowing yourself to embrace your passions. I'm already doing quite well with this, since mine are finding out about new ideas, discussions, writing and reading. I'm trying to think of ways that I can reflect this in my daily life. For a while I've wanted to use this blog as a place to store quotations, ideas, thoughts and fleeting moments, so my conclusion is that I'm going to start posting something at least 5 days a week. Let's see how I go!

“Well-being is attained by little and little, and nevertheless is no little thing itself.”
Zeno of Citium

Fat and Fashion...

Finally the whole host of exciting Fat Fashion blogs have been recognised by none other than the Guardian. Last week Kira Cohrane wrote an article titled 'Young, Fat and Fabulous', where she comments and discusses the work of some brilliant fat fashion blogs.

Here are some of my personal favourites to keep an eye out for:

• Corpulent
• Fashion Hayley (Australian Fashion magazine stylist)
• Fat Girls Like Nice Clothes Too
• Le Blog de Big Beauty (in French)
• Young, Fat & Fabulous

There's a few to keep you going but it excites me that this area of fat and fashion is being recognised beyond the Fat-o-sphere. It seems it is being acknowledged as something special in and of itself. I hope that long may this continue to expand.